When I was a teenager in the late 1960s and growing up in New York, I can remember so vividly what all the parents in our neighborhood told their kids whenever the youngsters asked if they could participate in an activity that the parents deemed unsafe or inappropriate given the child’s age. Here’s how the dialogue typically unfolded:

Teenager: “Mom, a lot of people in my class are going for an overnight trip in a few weeks. Can I go with them?”

Mom: (after finding out all the details about the trip): “No, you can’t go. I don’t think you are ready for that yet – and there isn’t enough supervision.”

Teenager: “But Billy, Ron and Jake are going – their parents gave them permission to go.”

Mom: “If Billy, Ron and Jake jumped off a bridge, would you jump too?”

Of course, Mom’s point was this: just because other people do something doesn’t mean it’s a wise thing to do. Mom was going to make her own assessment and not blindly follow what other kids or their parents were doing.

How does this relate to your spiritual journey?

Spiritually, many people are jumping off bridges. They are playing the game of “follow the follower” – and the activities they are engaging in are draining their spirits.

Let me offer a few examples. I’ll start with the obsession about money and consumption. The holiday season revolves around money. Peace and love are nice ideas, but who has time for that? The meaning behind the holidays themselves is virtually lost. Everyone focuses on shopping. Businesses want to maximize profits. Kids are taught to worship the newest toys. We’re jumping off the bridge, conforming to what others are doing. And we lack the guts to “break the chain” and say “I’m not going to follow that. I’m going to set a different example for my family.”

As I see it, you can “deprive” your child of some material possessions – or you can deprive them of their spiritual development. You’re choosing one or the other, whether you realize it or not.

I’m not recommending that you renounce all material possessions. Money is as “spiritual” as anything else. There are many wonderful ways to use money and I see nothing wrong with having the comforts life can offer. But money seems to be the highest priority these days. We’re at the point where we allow businesses in the U.S and around the world to pollute the rivers and the environment so these companies can make more and more money – and we (as consumers) can save a few cents on the cost of an item.

Speaking of possessions, think of the stuff we stockpile in our homes and apartments. Do we really need all of it? Does it “free” your spirit – or drain your spirit — every time you look at all the clutter you’ve accumulated?

Here’s another example — the complexity of our lives. As a teenager, I remember doing my homework after school and then going outside to play sports with my friends. It was quite simple. Now, kids in the U.S. have several structured activities every day. Their calendars rival those of busy executives. And their parents have to drive them from one place to another so the children can follow this hectic schedule!

The kids never learn how to just BE – or to play without any agenda. They are trained to expect activities all the time. Of course, this also takes a tremendous toll on the parents, who are stressed out and overextended. But very few parents are willing to stop jumping off this bridge.

The argument parents offer is that they don’t want their children to miss out on any opportunities. They don’t want them to be at a disadvantage since other kids are engaging in these activities. These parents are choosing to play according to “rules” set by others. Perhaps the child WILL get into a “better” college or earn more money in the long run by becoming a busy person from the age of three – but at what cost to the child’s spiritual development?

I could go on and on citing examples, but there is no need. I have no doubt you could come up with a dozen more ways we’re jumping off bridges and getting away from our divine connection.

The more important question is: what bridges will you STOP jumping off? I admit that I still jump off some of these bridges, but I’m doing it less and less… and it feels better and better. My spirit thanks me each time I don’t jump.

I’m not suggesting that you go on a crusade to convince others to be more “spiritual” and to change their behavior. This message is addressed to one and only one potential bridge jumper – YOU.

When you refuse to jump off bridges that everyone else is jumping off, be prepared for people to ridicule you or tell you that you are not being “realistic” in today’s world. No need to argue with them. Just smile and know that each bridge you refuse to jump off brings you closer to the peace and lasting satisfaction that bridge jumping can never bring.

– Jeff Keller
© 2007

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.

Enlightenment is not imagining figures of light but making the darkness conscious.

Where love rules, there is no will to power; and where power predominates, love is lacking.

You meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it.

I was drinking a cup of herbal tea (the brand was Yogi Tea) and noticed that this phrase appeared on the paper portion of the tea bag attached to the string:

“Love, compassion and kindness are the anchors of life.”

That’s a good message for today. It’s also a good way to live our lives every day.

Can we apply this phrase to ALL areas of our life? Can we apply it at work? Can we apply it to everyone in our family? Can we apply it to everyone we meet, even those who are unkind? Can we apply it to ourselves?

Let’s live today from that place of love, compassion and kindness… and notice the difference it makes.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009

Last week, when I announced my reasons for discontinuing this newsletter, I mentioned that I was considering the possibility of including some non-duality videos in this newsletter before the final issue is published on November 6, 2009.

Many subscribers sent emails asking for more information about non-duality and requesting that some videos be included. Accordingly, I am sharing with you three videos from one of my favorite teachers of non-duality named Mooji. The YouTube videos are listed below. Hundreds of Mooji’s video segments can be found on YouTube.

If you wish to learn more about Mooji, you can visit his web site at www.mooji.org  – the site also contains his biography. He is an interesting fellow, as well as being a talented artist.

As I have said previously, non-duality is not for everyone. These video messages may speak to you – or you might find them confusing or ridiculous. As I always say, trust your heart.

There are many teachers of non-duality, and many take a different approach than Mooji, although all of them are pointing to the same realization (referred to by Mooji as “the recognition and direct experience of Being”).

It has been my experience that only those who are willing to question ALL of their assumptions about life, religion and reality are ripe for the message of non-duality.

There are no “shoulds” when it comes to this topic. I am not saying that you should be interested in this topic. You are drawn to explore non-duality….or you aren’t. Honor whatever comes up for you.

Video Titles:

How does identification drop away?

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Moojiji#p/u/41/ETk7mizoI5k  

Dance Empty Handed

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Moojiji#p/u/14/Yg3o46zGUes  

Who runs the world?

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Moojiji#p/u/3/HttlNxVFnwU  

A friend of mine recently sent me this fascinating story about a musician who performed in a Washington, D.C. subway station.

If you haven’t seen it already, I invite you to read the story – and then watch the YouTube video that captures part of the performance.

http://tinyurl.com/yhacn7z  

If you missed Parts 1-4 of this series, you can read them at www.YourSpiritualJourney.net  .

Is it possible to live life without clinging to any particular story or outcome?

Most of us have been conditioned to put a lot of energy into creating a better story and achieving better labels. We want better relationships, more money, a better job, a more prestigious job title, more possessions, better health, more happiness.

Even if we like the way our current script is going, we want to improve it. So we go to work, mentally, to create a better story – and then attempt to manifest this story in reality.

This may sound very natural to you. In fact, you might go so far as to say, “Is there any other way to approach life?”

Here’s an important question to ask yourself: Are your stories bringing you peace… or do they create tension? You may feel that to create the future story you want will require struggle and tension.

You may have experienced significant improvements during your life by trying to re-write parts of your story. I’ve had that experience as well. But there were parts of my story that did not improve as I wanted, and I had a nagging feeling that trying to change the story line would never bring me the peace I wanted.

When I got the invitation to drop my story, or at least ease up on it, I began to see how the story was doing more harm than good. Now I see that holding onto any story, or trying to revise my story, is completely unnecessary.

Stories activate the mind. Stories block the awareness of spirit. We get caught in past and future thinking and the only reality – THIS MOMENT – is missed.

I know many of you are thinking that trying to drop our stories is not practical. After all, we need our stories to function in this world. In a sense, this is correct. We do need to remember certain elements of our story to operate in this physical universe. We need to know our name, and to remember essential facts such as where live, where we work and how to perform our jobs.

So in those respects we need our stories.

What I discovered, however, is that you don’t need an active mind to remind you of this information. You have access to what you need, naturally….when you need it.
Whether you care to admit it or not, maintaining or revising your story is exhausting. It saps a lot of your energy. You have some victories, and this gives you a high. But there is a price for that victory. You sacrifice your peace and well-being.

In addition, how do you feel when your projections and goals don’t come out as you wanted? What went wrong? Why do some projections result in victory while others end in disappointment? Your mind will never figure this out. It will encourage you to try harder next time, have more belief, visualize more intently, buy another book, go to another seminar, find a more enlightened spiritual teacher.

What if you surrendered completely to the flow of your life? What if you had complete faith in God to provide for you….and to show you the way?

Who or what do you trust more – God’s will – or the list you’ve made of all the things you want to acquire or to become?

Somehow, I don’t think God needs our list. God doesn’t require us to develop a story. We can leave the story of our lives to God. The story will unfold with or without our mental strategies. The only thing we will lose by giving up our story is the agitation we are suffering now.

I’m not suggesting for a moment that you deny your story. It’s part of the magic of human existence. If someone asks your name, you will respond very naturally. If they ask your occupation, you can respond very naturally. You will show interest in the stories of others from time to time.

However, you’ll see that you don’t need to tell everyone your story. You are not your story. Your story keeps changing, but something about you is not changing and is witnessing these stories. Our connection to spirit is found when the focus is on what is not changing, as opposed to what IS changing.

You don’t need to manage your story or revise your story. Your story will flow quite nicely without your mind getting actively involved in trying to figure things out.

As I was writing this article, I looked out the window and saw hundreds and hundreds of birds flying in formation – it looked and sounded like the Alfred Hitchcock movie, “The Birds.” They landed on the lawn and a minute later, they were moving to another part of the lawn in unison. Then they went skyward, did some incredible flying stunts, and swooped down again on to the lawn.

These birds had no story that they were working on. They were 100% in the flow of nature, being carried by God’s grace. Are we humans exempt from this grace?

A common misconception is that giving up the story and your projections will make you passive, like a zombie. You’re not going to sit on the couch and do nothing for the rest of your life. God has a lot more in store for you once you surrender to the flow of life. It’s true that there may be a period of transition or adjustment as you shift from reliance on mind strategies to listening to the guidance of spirit. You may slow down a bit, temporarily.

Trust God/Spirit to know what you need and what pace your life should take. When God shows you how to help yourself, you’ll take the necessary action.

What I can’t promise you is what turns your story will take if you give up trying to control your life. And that scares the heck out of most people.

If you give up the obsession about directing your story, it’s possible that the details of your story won’t change very much. Not everyone experiences radical changes. It’s also possible that you WILL experience significant changes in your life. No way to know ahead of time.

One thing you can count on is that fear will arise when you even suggest to your mind that you don’t need its planning services and manifestation services any longer. The mind doesn’t like to be pushed out of its traditional role.

Another thing you can count on is that many people will tell you that you are crazy and headed for disaster. They will encourage you to keep working on your story.

I don’t know if you are ready to give up your stories or whether that is the best course for you now. So I will offer this advice: Follow what your heart tells you to do.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009

P.S. The last issue of Your Spiritual Journey Newsletter will be sent out on November 6, 2009 – exactly two years after the first issue was published. I have enjoyed sharing these messages, but it is time to move on. I’ll explain more in the next issue.

Let’s continue the discussion about our stories and how they affect our lives and our spiritual growth.

If you take a close look at your stories, you will see that almost all of them are thoughts you hold in your mind. Your nationality, your religion, your spirituality, your occupation – all of these are thoughts in your mind that can come and go. They can’t be the essence of what you are on the spiritual level.

Assume your friend John has an accident and suffers amnesia. John no longer knows his nationality, religion, occupation or any other fact of his past. Does John still exist? Yes.

Is John a different person after the accident? No, it’s the same person. If you believe that each person has a spiritual essence, you wouldn’t say that John’s spirit has changed.

The only things that have changed are the thoughts and beliefs in the mind of John – and the thoughts and beliefs of those who interact with John and who may now see him in a different light. For instance, you may not have liked John and his personality before the accident. Now you may have sympathy for him as you watch him confused and struggling. You are telling yourself a different story about him.

We often take ourselves to be our story. We take others to be the story they are telling. On the level of eternal, unchanging spirit, this is not true.

Why should we care about how much emphasis we place on stories? What is the big deal?

Stories appear to be relatively harmless, until we realize how much pain and suffering they cause us. How do you feel when your story isn’t going as you want? Stressed? Frustrated?

When your spouse isn’t following the script or story you have established for them, how do you feel? At peace…or tense?

When your children aren’t following the story you have projected for them, does this cause you a little anxiety?

When people around the world are committing unspeakable acts of violence, are you getting anywhere by insisting that they adopt your story and give up their own? Is this bringing you peace? Is it solving the violence?

Of course, you can point to the flip side as well. When the story IS going as you wish, you’re happy. When the goals or projections are achieved, you’re content. Until the story takes a “negative” turn again.

Is this roller-coaster of ups and downs the way we are meant to live? Happy when the story is going well….and sad when the story takes a turn we don’t like? Is the answer to be found by talking about our story constantly….or trying to fix it so that we develop a better story?

Is it possible to live life without insisting on any particular story or outcome? Try to keep an open mind before drawing any conclusions.

These are not esoteric, philosophical questions. They are very practical, and I’ll be exploring these questions in the next newsletter.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009

If you want to read Parts 1 and 2 of this series, published on October 2, 2009 and October 6, 2009, go to www.YourSpiritualJourney.net  .

In this issue, I’ll begin the discussion about our stories and how they influence our lives and our spiritual growth. It might help at this point to re-introduce the pivotal question posed by author Byron Katie:

“Who would you be without your story?”

Your story includes the roles of who you take yourself to be (mother, father, son, occupation, social status) as well as your life circumstances – the things you are experiencing now and have experienced in the past. In addition, many people have stories (or expectations) about what they would like to create in the future.

When you tell someone about how you were victimized in life, this is part of your story. When you tell someone how you overcame obstacles and triumphed in life, this is part of your story. Your story also includes the areas in which you are disciplined – and the areas where you lack discipline. The things you prefer – and the things you detest.

We are more than willing to tell our life stories to anyone who will listen. The overwhelming majority of these stories are self-centered – the topic is ME, ME, ME. Here’s what I did. Here’s what happened to me. These are my favorite foods. We all do this.

For instance, if someone tells us how they couldn’t find a recipe they have written down on a piece of paper at home, we can’t wait to tell them how we never misplace a recipe because we purchased a special folder, and devised a color coded system to retrieve any recipe in a matter of seconds.

We may say that we’re telling them only to help them. Yeah right. We want to show how clever we are.

Did you ever notice that when someone mentions a food you absolutely hate, you can’t help but interrupt their story as soon as possible to say how much you hate that food? It has no relevance to their story, yet you feel compelled to tell YOUR story about it.

We may even kid ourselves and believe that the people at work or in our families love to hear all our stories.

Of course, stories are not all bad. They add richness and flavor to life. It’s enjoyable to hear the stories of others…until they tell them for the ninth time… or spend ten minutes telling a story that should have taken one minute. Yes, I do this too.

Take a moment to consider your stories. What topics do they usually involve? What percentage of the stories are about you? Do you repeat the same story over and over? How are these stories related to your spiritual essence? Is your spirit actually involved in these stories – or does the spirit stand “apart” in some way?

Let’s start slowly on this subject. I’ll continue the discussion of stories in the next issue.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009

I’d like to spend some more time in this issue discussing labels.

Labels, as interpreted and used by the mind, are not harmless. The labels often create separation and encourage us to judge others. How much hatred and judgment in the world is generated by religious and spiritual labels? We even judge those who claim to have the same label as we do when we feel they aren’t living up to the standards of the label as we interpret it.

Of course, the problem isn’t limited to religious labels. I am going to feel that MY political party is superior to yours. I will tend to view MY country as being better than your country. I will want MY team to beat your team. And although I will not admit it (for fear of how you will label me), I may actually feel some degree of happiness when the best player on your team suffers an injury, which allows MY team to win.

The mind/ego is ruthless and wants to win, to gets its way. I celebrate when my label prevails over your label. It’s a silly game, and yet almost everyone is playing it.

Almost all religions and spiritual traditions teach us to view every person as part of one human family. Once the labels are imposed (nationality, religion, race, social class, etc.), the mind begins to take sides and draw lines of distinction. I defend the labels I believe in, and judge or condemn those I take to be less desirable.

How then can I love my neighbor as myself? How can I love and respect all equally? Once I label and begin to believe in these labels, this becomes impossible. I can say that I view everyone equally in an attempt to be consistent with my religion or spirituality, but these are empty words. Or to put it more bluntly, I am lying.

Let’s take racial prejudice as an example. I grew up in a white neighborhood in Queens, a borough of New York City. The public high school I attended was integrated but I had little interaction with African-Americans outside of school. I consider myself to be an open-minded person who respects others.

But if you ask me whether I am prejudiced, I can answer without hesitation, “YES.” Who isn’t? Society conditions you at an early age to view your race or nationality differently than others. You can’t escape it. And if you asked any of the African-Americans who went to school with me whether they had any prejudice toward white people, I haven’t the slightest doubt that the overwhelming majority (if not all) would say “YES.”

A question naturally arises: if we are conditioned to believe in the significance of our labels, how can we undo this conditioning?

Not an easy question to answer, but I’ll share what I am discovering. There is no need to make an effort to “undo” the conditioning. Some conditioning will remain with us for the rest of our lives, no matter what we do. Let the conditioning be as it is.

All we need to do is shine the light of Awareness on these labels. Simply become aware of the labels and their effect on us.

When you investigate these labels with an open mind and open heart, they will begin to have less and less power in your life. You will catch the conditioning at a very early stage and just smile and acknowledge it. What will happen is that you won’t be as emotionally invested in defending and perpetuating your labels.

The conditioning is still there and you will use labels because they are important for your day to day life in referring to things and drawing distinctions. If someone asks you to describe how a person looks, you have to use labels to communicate. There is no other way.

However, as your awareness of labeling increases, you’ll notice a shift. When you refer to someone who has a different label, you will feel a closer connection with them. You will sense that while you and the other person have different appearances or belief systems, the essence of both of you is beyond labeling.

The quiet, aware mind has little interest in labels. The busy, ego-dominated mind loves to apply labels, and plenty of mischief ensues.

People rarely investigate how their mind uses these labels to separate and judge. That is why they stay so emotionally invested in those labels. When we are unconscious about the use of our labels, we will lie and distort to defend our labels, and we’ll attack those with different labels.

Investigate and see how labels influence your thinking and behavior. As you ease up on your labels, you will feel the lightness of spirit. Of course, you’ll continue to use labels for convenience in the phenomenal world, but you will not use them as often to define yourself or others – or to attack yourself and others.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009

Author Byron Katie often asks people who are caught up in the drama of their lives this question: Who would you be without your story?

I’ve found that it’s one of the most important questions we can ask if we are truly interested in spiritual growth.

When I refer to stories, I mean the descriptions and labels we apply to ourselves. Your story includes your gender, your nationality, your religion, your occupation, your emotions, your beliefs, etc.; your story also includes your life circumstances, such as the things you’ve experienced.

Everything that makes up your life story has one important characteristic – it CHANGES. One day you’re a wife or husband, the next day you might be single or widowed. One day you’re a salesperson, and two years later, you’re a teacher. Perhaps you were an atheist at one time and then became a Christian. You might have been depressed at one time in your life and now you describe yourself as a happy person.

Something as rock solid as your gender will even change – upon your death. One thousand years after your physical body dies, what is left of your gender? It evaporates.

Even if you don’t change religions, your story about your religion IS changing. You may say you’re growing in your walk with God, that your understanding is deepening. This represents a change in your life story.

Your story keeps changing. The labels keep changing.

However, there is something about YOU that never changes – and that is the Awareness, Beingness or Spirit that has been the witness of all these changes. Something has always been there to know the happiness and sadness, to know the you that was an atheist and is now a Christian, the you that was a salesperson and is now a teacher.

If you change political affiliations from Democrat to Republican, does your spiritual essence change? Of course not. It’s the same you.

Yet human beings tend to spend almost all of their time concentrating on the changing events and labels. They are obsessed with the life story; it is the way we are conditioned, and we see everyone else living from their labels and stories.

You may not like to hear this, but even your religion is a label that can change. You may say, “I am a Christian” or “I am Jewish.” Is that really who you are – or is that a belief you currently have about yourself?

Let’s take an extreme example to illustrate this point. Assume someone named John says “I am a Christian” today. Tomorrow, John falls down, bumps his head and suffers from amnesia. When asked tomorrow about his religion, John replies, “I don’t follow any particular religion.”

Is John still a Christian? John may have a different belief now but nobody would say that the essence of John has changed. The same essence that we associated with his body when he said “I am a Christian” is the same essence associated with his body when he claims not to have any religious affiliation.

The labels of “American,” “European” or “African” are just part of our stories. They can come and go. If I change citizenship during my life, have I become a different person? Does this create a “new” spiritual entity? I don’t think anyone would say that my spirit or essence changes. I just adopt a different label and while it may have significance in my overall life story, it has no enduring significance on the spiritual level.

Although difficult to define, I would say that what has significance on the spiritual level is what doesn’t change, what is eternal.

I’m not saying that we should deny our labels or stories as we go through this amazing mystery called life as a human being. Descriptions such as nationality, occupation and religion play an important role in the material world.

The “problem” is that we believe these labels or stories have a significance that they don’t have. We believe that we ARE our labels and our stories. These labels and stories are thoughts in our mind.

In addition, we tend to give all our thought to the things that are changing – and virtually no attention is put on what doesn’t change.

You are NOT your story. You are NOT your labels. You are much more than that. And what you are is not changing and has no form. It is recognized in the body/mind as the sense “I AM” or “I EXIST.” This is always with you. Nobody can deny this sense of their own existence.

Recognizing this changeless Awareness has been invaluable to me on my spiritual journey. I realize it will not resonate with some of you.

I’ll continue this discussion in the next issue, including my own observations about what happens when less emphasis is put on our stories. I welcome your comments as this series progresses.

– Jeff Keller
© 2009