Group Involvement and the Spiritual Path (Part 1)
As each year goes by, I have less and less interest in belonging to groups. As my spiritual beliefs grow, my desire to be part of a group goes in the opposite direction.
I’m referring to all groups and organizations, but particularly those where you actively participate in some way (or are expected to participate). These include political clubs, trade associations, community groups, and even groups relating to your hobbies or leisure. Religious affiliations and congregations also constitute group involvement, but I’m not going to discuss them in this message. Instead, I will examine them in the next issue of this newsletter.
You might cherish your involvement with groups. They may be helpful to you in your business and in your personal affairs. That’s fine. I’m not trying to get you to renounce your affiliation with groups. This is an invitation to explore whether the groups you belong to are helping you – or hindering you – on your spiritual path.
Let’s consider the business, community and other groups to which you now belong. You might want to take a piece of paper and write down the groups you belong to. As you consider each group, ask yourself: “In what ways does my involvement in this group feed my spirit, and in what ways does it drain my spirit?”
If the very thought of the group gets you excited, your involvement is probably feeding your spirit. If the thought of the group has you focused primarily on its negative aspects, or how it takes up too much of your time, chances are your spirit is being drained. If you have a neutral feeling about the group, this may suggest that your spirit would be better served if you allocated your time to something other than the group.
Many of us cling to our groups out of habit. We’ve been a member of the group for a long time, so we feel we should continue to be a member and support the group. We don’t really want to participate in the group’s meetings, programs or committees, but we feel guilty about saying “no” or leaving the group altogether. Your spiritual core knows you are “wasting” your time staying involved in this group; however, you are too concerned about how others would perceive you if you decided to leave the group.
As you grow spiritually, there are aspects of groups that may begin to bother you. You dislike the politics and power struggles that are part of almost every group. You have difficulty tolerating the pettiness and the rigid adherence to certain practices that no longer make sense to you. In some cases, you look at the dwindling attendance at the meetings and wonder why you’re still involved with the group.
In almost any group, there is pressure to conform. The leadership has a view about where the group should be headed, and change is often resisted. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. Trust your own feelings and be honest enough to admit if your spirit is rebelling and urging you to drop out of the group.
In my experience, conformity is an obstacle to our spiritual growth. We need to develop our own personal connection with God and to do what our inner voice tells us to do. When we feel pressure to follow the rules and practices of a group, we often deny our own wishes or act in ways we don’t feel are right.
You can make a strong argument that we have to learn to compromise in life and that one of the best ways to learn this skill is by participating in groups. You can also say that groups help to keep us connected with others and provide valuable learning opportunities. All this is true.
But I’m talking about your spiritual growth here. Groups can take up a lot of your time and they can push you to do things you don’t believe in. The time you were spending with the group is time you can spend with your family, or doing some other activity such as exercising. It is time you could spend by yourself, in solitude.
In our 20s, 30s and 40s, we wear our group affiliations and committee responsibilities as a badge of honor. We brag about how busy we are, and we’re proud of all that we’re accomplishing. And then, when we reach our 50s, many of us realize we’re playing a game that will not bring us lasting satisfaction or spiritual fulfillment. We’ve grown tired of the conformity. We know the time could be better spent elsewhere.
We can grow spiritually by being part of groups. Yet I think there is a limit to where we can go spiritually in a group setting. I believe the deepest spiritual connection is found when we have a one-on-one relationship with God. We listen to the guidance we are receiving from God, and we can act on whatever we hear, not having to get anyone else’s approval.
You might be part of certain networking groups or business trade associations where you dislike some things about the group but you feel it is important to remain as a member because you can get some business as a result of your membership in these groups. There’s nothing wrong with continuing your membership.
Concentrate on those groups that are draining your spirit and where you aren’t getting many tangible benefits. Have the courage to leave those groups, regardless of what others say or think.
– Jeff Keller
© 2008