Note: This newsletter will not be published during the week of November 24. For those celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday, I wish you and your families a magnificent holiday. I am so grateful to all of the subscribers for your support of this newsletter and for contributing your experiences and insights. The next issue is scheduled to be published on Tuesday, December 2.

– Jeff Keller

The following poem was contributed by Ollie Lind, one of our subscribers in Australia. Ollie is a very talented writer, poet and company coach.

Looking

To live, to love;
to learn, to share.
These are the gifts
that I must bear.

To know another,
if not my brother.
Kindred soul, not part, but whole.
To love as though a mother.

I do not know how it came,
somehow I rose above my shame
of finding others to blame.
Past regrets, a futile game.

Now I know, I finally see,
that all I have to do is be.
I choose the path that I shall tread.
I look with hope, no longer dread.

Ollie Lind
© 2008
http://www.ollielind.com  

Here are more comments I received from subscribers in response to my message, What You’ve Learned, published on November 11, 2008. If you want to read that message, go to www.YourSpiritualJourney.net  .

* * *

“My tolerance level has increased. I accept opinions that differ to mine and I am able to listen to them, and move on without opposing them vocally as I did before.

I have realised that all relationships touch our lives in some way and as such we need not fear to meet new persons however different they might be to us.

I am able to give tough love to my children without feeling guilty, for as long as I know by giving the tough love I am teaching valuable lessons for their own good.

I have realised that no matter how small we may feel a kind deed is it has great impact, resulting in a chain reaction of more kind deeds performed by several others as it motivates the recipients of kindness to be kind to another. I have realised that fostering relationships is to me the most important thing in this life. Just a telephone call or an e-mail saying that you care can lift ones spirit.”

* * *

“God is a very hard teacher .HE puts us into test making us to learn the lessons after that.
The most important lesson for me, is that, we should take life as it comes, without probing , why this for me, why this trouble for me. If HE gives happiness we are not asking HIM why to me but the other way round. The reasons for everything that happens to us has some reasons .

As a firm believer of KARMA theory , I had taken the worst that happened to me as it was- two years back-my beloved wife was snatched away suddenly by fate ,leaving me alone, since my two married daughters are abroad. The path I decided to pursue was to lead a peaceful life doing service to the society seeing my beloved wife in that (doing under the trust started with my departed wife’s name). I have also learned that it is not the world that distresses but the way we interpret the happenings in our world. Also our home should be the center, not the periphery of our action. We cannot rewrite the past but certainly the future thru our good thoughts and deeds. These valuable lessons I have learnt with the crucial test of GOD thru my beloved wife’s death.”

* * *

“A lesson learned for me in the last 5 years was the birth of my grandson. I call it, My New Love. Before his birth, I guess I really did not understand what love is. Sure, I felt love before his birth, but never really understood love. What his birth taught me is this. You journey through life and have various associations with loved ones. They are your Mother, your Father, your Brother your Sister. Now compare the love for the four. Is your love exactly the same for your mother as it is for your father? Do you find the love of your mother different as the love of your father? I did. My mother was kind and gentle and always was there to pick me up and console my sole. My father was a leader of the family and a disciplinarian at times, but you would feel his love through his fatherly talks and assurances. Then there is the love of a brother and sister. Each has its place in joy and comfort but they are different. Now examine the love of Friends and examine how you love them different than your entire family.

Once you become your own family, you quickly realize loves in your Spouse and Children.
Then you have a Grandchild. For me, this struck me hard and all I could talk about was my grandson. Why was I so giddy over him? The feeling overwhelmed me and this is when I realized, a grandchild is another love! It was his birth that woke me up to realize God gives us all types of love that “we” internalize and do what we want with. It is up to us to become giddy about the love and make it special.

I liken love to a greenhouse of different flowers. If you take one flower that you particularly like and give it the most fertile soil and water it consistently, it will flourish. If you have other flowers that you have determined were beautiful, but not as beautiful as your new flower, you may place it further away from your attention and not give it as much fertile soil and water. The result usually is a withering away. You could start paying attention to these again and bring them back to life, couldn’t you? Now look at your loves and examine what has withered. Can you bring it back to life?

My new love in my Grandchild taught me to go back and look at all the rest of my loves and rekindle the love I have for them too.”

* * *

“A couple of things that were not important to me before now are very important to me. It is important to me to recycle and play active roles to keep planet Earth green and liveable for future generations to enjoy. Another is that I learned how important it is to build relationships with people just having been in a managerial position. Before, I was very task-oriented; I was always interested in getting things done. I learned how time is a very precious commodity that cannot be replenished with money. Even though I am only in my 30s, I see each year goes by faster than ever, and I try to make each day an enjoyable and productive one from my perspective. I learned how important it is to slow down and smell the roses. Now, I try to be present around people and really listen to what they are saying to me. I am learning to be more reflective of my actions and goals by taking mini breaks, vacations, walks, and journaling if I can discipline myself to do it consistently.

Before it was important for me to have a materialistic life, but now it’s evolving to a lower priority. Now, I want to learn and understand about people, different cultures, life, travel, career development, etc.”

* * *

“I have learned that with the best management theories, His game plans are difficult to
understand.

I am talking here of my experience mostly at the work place. There are a number of situations where we analyze different scenarios and prepare ourselves using the best management tools, using (so called) proven theories. Still, that is not enough and God has his own game plans.
There are many situations that are unprecedented and we have to surrender.

We work with limited inputs and information while working with these theories whereas He has unlimited ways to force us into new directions. This is one reason why refinements are always required in management theories. We can never catch Him in absolute terms.”

* * *

The most important thing I’ve learned in life is that “I just don’t know.”

* * *

“Keys for me now that I am semi retired are: learning to relax more, listen better and reach out a helping hand to others where you can.”

* * *

“I used to see God as fearsome, and I used to believe in Hell. Now I believe God is forgiving and loving beyond our capacity to imagine and while Hell is a useful concept to fear that keeps us on the right track, that God has not cast anyone in Hell, not a single soul. Also I used to fear or dread death; in the last 10 years I have had two bouts of cancer where I experienced death’s door. There I experienced the GREAT BENEVOLENCE of God, to know how good HE is, how much he loves every single person who lived, is now living and will ever live. I feel death is not bad but NATURAL, as natural as being born, and that life has a beginning and an end and I see my life as this special privilege in time.
I used to think the world was harsh and a difficult place, but now I see it as a Garden of Eden that is not getting any respect and is being trashed. How I have changed my outlook in the last 10 years in how I live? I value sacrifice, thrift, study, order, simplicity, responsibility, intelligence, spiritual peace through, for example, meditation. I used to but don’t anymore, value fashion, family gatherings in huge gluttonous feasts. I used to be an afraid person and now I am not afraid.
Ten years ago I thought America was rich but now I see America is not run well and is actually poor. I believe America and maybe the world, is at the beginning of an extreme financial depression and that families will have no choice but to gather together and sacrifice in many ways to physically survive. But I grew up at the end of the last great depression and know that it is all do-able.”

* * *

I want to thank all those who took the time to share their experiences and life lessons. All are valuable, even though I was not able to include all of them in this newsletter.

– Jeff Keller

I received many comments in response to my last message, “What You’ve Learned” (November 11, 2008).

All of the comments were fascinating. Thank you for sharing your own life lessons and insights. In this issue, I am including excerpts from some of the emails I received. In upcoming issues, I will include more of them. I don’t want to overwhelm you at one time, so I am breaking them up.

I regret that I am not able to share all of them. I truly feel all are valuable and I learned and benefited from them. Here is the first batch of reader comments:

* * *

“In the past 10 years I have begun to desire more and more to help others as much as possible and to do all I am able to make this world a better place. My husband passed away a few years ago. His illness & death really opened my eyes to see how short our lives are and how unimportant material things are. Good health and peace of mind are more important to me than material comfort.

I have learned to be more patient, considerate and loving toward all people, especially those who are not of the same race, faith, or social standing as I am. Most of my life I have lived to make myself and my family comfortable and happy. My desire now is to focus beyond my own little corner of the world. I believe I had to reach a certain level of maturity and have certain life experiences before this attitude truly became a part of me.”

* * *

“The greatest lesson I’ve learned in the last 10 years - to trust God implicitly. I do not have to know what His plans for me are, or where He is taking me. It is enough to know that whatever He plans for me, it will be for the best!”

* * *

“One of the lessons I’ve learned over the years is not to worry, in an excessive way, when something goes wrong. Either in your personal life, or your work life, something that you did, or said, turns out, in your mind, to be a colossal crisis. One of the ways to cope with this “crisis” is to say to yourself, ‘Is this going to be a crisis 10 years from now, or even 10 days from now?’ In other words, learn from your mistake, but don’t let it control your life for a long time. Someone wrote a book with the title “This Too Shall Pass” and that seems to be a good philosophy, for you to put into effect immediately, when mistakes happen.”

* * *

“The most important thing I learned is that LOVE is the key to everything. I do not consider cost anymore when someone needs help. Before I was rather judgmental now I feel all people and animals and flowers are beautiful and for me to enjoy and I do. And because of that I meet more beautiful people daily. Life to me now compared to 10 years ago is more beautiful everyday — and I am grateful to all my teachers – Number One my Wife. Love you ALL.”

* * *

“I’m in my 40s. As I grow older, I see that when I pass on in this life, my epitaph will not contain one word about my level of education, my promotions or net worth, or my job title. It will simply say the years of my birth and death– which are the two most important days we will have on Earth.

I used to get panic attacks and I took Tylenol PM every night for 7 years because I was in a high-paced, high stress profession (and still am). However, one day my phone rang and it was my son’s doctor with results of an MRI. That day, the stress went out the window– along with the Tylenol and panic attacks because I knew that even if I lost my business the next day, it would pale in comparison to losing my son. When the focus shifts from yourself to another, that is the only time when you can truly know peace.

Thanks to God, my son pulled through and is fine. But the lessons in priorities will remain a lifetime.”

* * *

“In October, 1998, my mother underwent brain surgery that left her with stroke-like effects on her left side. Prognosis was that she had less than a year left on earth. I embarked on the toughest, most love-filled journey of my life as I managed her rehab arrangements and prepared to move her to our house for hospice home care. Mom lived five and a half months with us, and I had the honor to be with her at her peaceful, mystical departure, singing her favorite hymns as I tidied up her room around her.

I learned that when I listen for guidance and follow it, every step, that I don’t need to worry about “how long…” or “when…” or “what…” — fretful details that my chattering mind wants answers to before acting. I can step out with faith that what is needed is provided at the right time, in the optimal way, better than I could have planned it in the first place.

The years since her passing have been years of events flowing into order with a sense of Beauty, Love and Grace. I am often in awe.”

* * *

I hope you found these comments to be of interest. More to come next time. If you haven’t sent your comments yet on lessons you’ve learned in the last 10 years, please do so by sending an email to jeff@YourSpiritualJourney.net  .

– Jeff Keller

What do you consider the most important lessons or insights you’ve gained in the last 10 years of your life? How do you see yourself, other people, God, or the world differently now than you did before?

What is important to you now that wasn’t important before? What is NOT important to you now….that was very important before?

I’d like to open the discussion on this subject. I recognize this is a very broad topic and that you can’t discuss everything you have learned in the last 10 years. Let your heart tell you which are the most important insights or life lessons to share with us.

Please send your email to jeff@YourSpiritualJourney.net and I will include some of the responses in upcoming issues of the newsletter.

I look forward to hearing from you – and to learning from you.

– Jeff Keller
© 2008

Note: Although this message discusses aspects of the presidential election, I have no interest in debating the merits of each of the candidates and their positions.

* * *

No matter which candidate you supported in the U.S. presidential election, I think you would agree that Tuesday night was an important moment in American and world history.

I learned some very valuable lessons on Tuesday night when Barack Obama was declared the next President of the United States. Prior to November 4, I underestimated the impact that an Obama victory would have on this country and throughout the world.

While I realized that the election of an African-American as president would be a very significant event for the United States, I underestimated how I would feel and what I would see when the event actually happened.

This is a monumental event in terms of race relations in the United States. Virtually everyone in this country, whether or not they voted for Obama, was touched by the tears of joy shed by African-Americans and whites.

I realize there is still widespread racism in the U.S., just as there is racism in every country. We haven’t reached a perfect world where everyone is perceived as equal. We are far from it.

But on November 4, 2008 the U.S. made huge strides in race relations. African-Americans, in huge numbers, appreciated the whites who voted for Obama. Although white people could never understand the full depth of the feelings being experienced by African-Americans, the whites could feel the intense emotions expressed by African-Americans – and it was deeply touching.

I also underestimated the response this would generate all around the world, where people have been wildly enthusiastic about the election results. So many people saw the U.S. in a different light – in an instant.

Why didn’t I see this coming? Why didn’t I realize the monumental significance of electing Barack Obama as president of the United States?

It’s because I was caught in the limited perception of my beliefs – and the emotions generated by those beliefs — during this election campaign. I was focused on who I was FOR and even more so, on who and what I was AGAINST. This blinded me in many ways to seeing the bigger picture.

I think the media missed the boat here as well. While they would occasionally say “this would be the first African-American ever to be elected president”, the words were uttered more as a statistic and did not have a strong emotional impact. Nobody emphasized that this would result in whites and African-Americans celebrating in joy together and finding a connection that has never been seen in this country.

Throughout the campaign, I didn’t hear media reports that predicted how people around the world would be dancing in the streets and that they would see America in a more positive light. Instead the media focused on the attacks each candidate and his supporters made on the other candidate and his supporters.

I think many of us became embroiled in a war of BELIEFS and lost the big picture. That certainly happened to me. Beliefs can drag us into a dark hole where we get carried away with right and wrong – and winning and losing. Emotions run rampant.

Many people told me during the presidential campaign that they were getting so emotionally involved and agitated during the campaign that they had to stop watching and listening to the media reports. They had to stop discussing the election with friends and co-workers. And many of these people are calm, open-minded people. Yet they were taken out of their normal personalities while getting over-invested in their beliefs and emotions. When the mind gets very engaged, watch out!

Many people idolize beliefs and often use this quote: “If you don’t believe in something, you will fall for anything.” I am finding the opposite to be true. When you operate from that place of no beliefs (or no attachment to beliefs), you will feel a natural love and compassion. That is our true nature.

We need to be taught to hate and judge others. It doesn’t come naturally. Someone must feed us this belief and we then accept it.

And yet, there is a paradox here. You could persuasively argue that Barack Obama’s beliefs propelled his candidacy and inspired others. Thus, he used the power of belief for a very positive purpose. I would agree.

Beliefs can serve us in many ways.

Beliefs can distract us and drag us into highly charged emotional states where we become intolerant and miss the big picture.

Come to your own conclusions as to how beliefs serve you… and how they may lead you astray or limit your view of the world.

– Jeff Keller
© 2008

If you did not read my previous message, The Other Side of Beliefs, (October 31, 2008)you can read it at www.YourSpiritualJourney.net .  

Here are some comments I received from subscribers on this subject:

* * *

“This has come up a lot in my home lately. I have always been passionate about politics and the past few months have been intense. I finally had to decide to unplug. The fear and negativity had become overwhelming. After a few weeks of disconnect I think I was better able to see how silly even the people I agree with had become.

I still feel strongly about our freedoms and protecting them but I recognize that we can not see the bigger picture. Everything happens for a reason and there are lessons to be learned, maybe as a nation.”

* * *

“The political race that is going on now is bringing out the best and worst in us as an American people. So many of us confess that we are Christians and that we love God, but the word says “how can you love God, if you hate your brother whom you see every day…”

We can’t worship together because of the color of our skin or our beliefs are a little different. But, has anyone thought about heaven, which we as Christian say we are going. The Bible that I read, does not say we will make it into heaven based on the color of our skin, wealth, health, but only on those who have accepted Christ as their Lord and Savior and belief that he died on the cross for EACH of US. I pray for the people of this world and not the world, because the world itself is beautiful, it’s just us as people living in it.

The word of God says, 2 Chronicles 7:14 - If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”

* * *

“You said it - “We defend our belief systems and see other belief systems as wrong.” This is where the problem is. This is where intolerance starts.

If we can accept that others have their beliefs and respect their right to follow what they believe whilst the others accept that we have our beliefs and respect our right to follow what we believe, the problem can be mitigated. The tolerance level will go up. It was like that in India. And that is how the people were united to achieve independence.

However, thanks to political leaders building their vote banks and religious leaders building their religious followings, the tolerance level is going down where the fuse is getting shorter (disgustingly so).

And I believe that all philosophies of life need to be reviewed and changes made in the way they are followed to make a better world. This includes Hindu philosophy (which I follow), Islam, Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, et al. Because in the philosophies themselves, again in my opinion, nothing is wrong.”

* * *

“I couldn’t agree with you more about the political climate. I do have my own set of beliefs, yet I remain open minded about opposing beliefs and listen to the other side before I tell them they are wrong. Being fair I adhere to the old saying “let’s be open minded about this before we decide my way is correct.”

Note: This subscriber was kidding. We all need to lighten up and find the humor in these situations!

* * *

“I believe that you can hold on to your beliefs without minimizing or criticizing others beliefs. Just respect theirs like you would like them to respect yours. Have discussions without putting others down for what they believe. It’s all about diplomacy and tact.”

* * *

“Your thoughts about beliefs are thought-provoking. I don’t however, believe it is beliefs that cause so much problem as it is that a certain belief tends to be missing which might go something like this: “No matter what positions a person holds, he or she is a person made in the image of God and therefore needs to be treated with respect, including how one responds to their opinions.”

Everyone is coming from somewhere and if we had the time to listen to each other we would all make a whole lot more sense to each other because we would see it is understandable why we believe as we do. Is there not a belief that counters the tendency to polarize people and positions and is consistent with the spirit of Christ to unite all things in Him?

I suspect your caution is about how people hold their beliefs, not so much that they have them.”

* * *

Another subscriber pointed out that this polarization of beliefs also applies to sporting events, where we root enthusiastically for our team and against the other team. I think this is quite true. We tend to suspend our notions of fairness and respect for the other team and its fans, as our main concern is WINNING.

As a result, insults are hurled between the fans of the opposing teams. Fights break out in the arena. It seems like we forget all about respect and love, the values we claim to be our spiritual foundation.

There is no doubt that certain beliefs contribute to the quality of our lives. Beliefs are not evil. However, the human mind gets wrapped up in some beliefs and we end up doing and saying things that are not consistent with our professed spiritual principles. Be vigilant in monitoring yourself when your beliefs start to pull you away from your spirit.

– Jeff Keller
© 2008