Stories and Labels (Part 3)
If you want to read Parts 1 and 2 of this series, published on October 2, 2009 and October 6, 2009, go to www.YourSpiritualJourney.net .
In this issue, I’ll begin the discussion about our stories and how they influence our lives and our spiritual growth. It might help at this point to re-introduce the pivotal question posed by author Byron Katie:
“Who would you be without your story?”
Your story includes the roles of who you take yourself to be (mother, father, son, occupation, social status) as well as your life circumstances – the things you are experiencing now and have experienced in the past. In addition, many people have stories (or expectations) about what they would like to create in the future.
When you tell someone about how you were victimized in life, this is part of your story. When you tell someone how you overcame obstacles and triumphed in life, this is part of your story. Your story also includes the areas in which you are disciplined – and the areas where you lack discipline. The things you prefer – and the things you detest.
We are more than willing to tell our life stories to anyone who will listen. The overwhelming majority of these stories are self-centered – the topic is ME, ME, ME. Here’s what I did. Here’s what happened to me. These are my favorite foods. We all do this.
For instance, if someone tells us how they couldn’t find a recipe they have written down on a piece of paper at home, we can’t wait to tell them how we never misplace a recipe because we purchased a special folder, and devised a color coded system to retrieve any recipe in a matter of seconds.
We may say that we’re telling them only to help them. Yeah right. We want to show how clever we are.
Did you ever notice that when someone mentions a food you absolutely hate, you can’t help but interrupt their story as soon as possible to say how much you hate that food? It has no relevance to their story, yet you feel compelled to tell YOUR story about it.
We may even kid ourselves and believe that the people at work or in our families love to hear all our stories.
Of course, stories are not all bad. They add richness and flavor to life. It’s enjoyable to hear the stories of others…until they tell them for the ninth time… or spend ten minutes telling a story that should have taken one minute. Yes, I do this too.
Take a moment to consider your stories. What topics do they usually involve? What percentage of the stories are about you? Do you repeat the same story over and over? How are these stories related to your spiritual essence? Is your spirit actually involved in these stories – or does the spirit stand “apart” in some way?
Let’s start slowly on this subject. I’ll continue the discussion of stories in the next issue.
– Jeff Keller
© 2009